Day 1

Quick post today. I gotta get to town to get some different boxing gloves. I hate pair I got so I need to get some more. The past few weeks I have been feeling increasingly frustrated. Not sure why. I go to bed in a bad mood. I wake up in a bad mood. The only thing I can think of to cure this is a punching bag. Maybe if I release some of my frustrations I will feel better. And hey, what a great way to burn some calories right?

That's all I've got. I don't even have the motivation to write. Hopefully that will change soon. Here's to hoping a little boxing therapy returns me to myself.

Is it Friday?

Sheesh, I have been exhausted these past few days. I've been coming home and crashing around 7:30pm, then getting up and going to bed. I don't know whats going on. Yeah, it's that time of the month but I don't think that's doing it. A few weekends ago I slept like all weekend long.

Here I go whining again--but I really need to start working out. I am going to do something as soon as I type this. We're watching a movie (sort of) and I would love nothing more than to go to sleep. But I will push myself to workout. Even if I do nothing more than push ups and sit ups, I will do something. Here's things I would like to get into:

• P90X
• Pilates
• Yoga
• Walking
• Running
• Biking
• Maybe some classes at the gym

I am like a football field away from a gym at work but I don't use it. I could easily strap on some shoes and run at lunch but it's deathly hot here. Not really my thing. The ideal time is to work out during the day while at work--I have a 1 hr lunch everyday but can take longer if need be. Also, technically I can go to the gym for 1 hour 3x a week on company time. I just don't want to do that right now. I have a ton to learn at work. I am way in over my head. So there's no time to take off work to work out. At lunch I tan or do other things like feeding cats, or running errands. I really don't have time. I could get up early in the morning to work out or I can do it when I get home. The best choice is when I get home, but I have kiddos at home that need something and I have to cook, do laundry, clean, etc.

There is a point to my whining: I need to make time in my schedule. It's almost 7pm. I got home around 5:30. I haven't washed clothes or cooked dinner. Dishes are still piled up. I did make the baby a bottle and gave it to her (she can hold her bottle now). So for an hour and a half I've read blogs and ate. Speaking of eating, I have been coming home and eating like a horse. Uggggg....This. Must. Stop. Now.

Back to the point: I need to get a schedule down and stick to it. I need to come home, work out, and be done with it. End of story.

Well that's that. I better get off the couch before I go to sleep. Yes, I just considered taking a nap instead. Must keep moving. Must keep moving.

Focus. Or is it RE-Focus?

Sorry for the lapse in posts. Life gets in the way sometimes. Fortunately for me, I decided I need to start living life.

Today is going to be a busy day. I have mounds of laundry to do then I have to read a huge document and answer questions before I go to training tomorrow. Ugggg.....This stuff is the most boring stuff I have read in I don't know how long. Takes me back to the law school days. Wait, this is a class on contracts. Didn't I do this already? At least I hope I walk away with a better understanding of my job. I also have to take H and H back to their dad. Fun stuff.

So, Kelly O and I are focused on getting rid of the flab. Actually, she's been focused for a while now. I've been saying I was focused but I have yet to prove it. Well, that changes today, hence the re-focusing. I have got to work out and change my diet. I lost 14 lbs, gained a couple back, now I am up to 7 lbs total gained. FAIL. Especially when my goal is 15-120 and I am sitting at 147 this morning. Wait...now I have never been the best at math, but isn't that 27-32 lbs that I need to lose. Damn. At least when that scale was at 140, I only had 20-25. So do you see the problem with how "focused" I was. I definitely see a problem. I am moving away from the goal, so things need to changed....without a doubt.

My goals:
Less calories in
Work out 6 days a week

It's that simple. I would love to start running again. I say this every year. I buy new running shoes and I fail to run. However, I think these just might do the trick. I need an 8.5. I will be more than happy to supply any mystery donors with my shipping address. Kidding. But yeah, I do love those shoes. I've tried numerous brands of running shoes and thus far, NB is my favorite. But I think I need to try another pair to make sure;-)

Anyway, coffee for breakfast. Later this morning I might have an eggwhite and spinach omelet. I've found the later I eat, the less hungry I am. And the less I eat, the less hungry I am.

I should get up and workout soon. I just need to get it over. Not sure what I am going to do, but I will let ya know soon.

I'm BACK!!!

I'm back here again. Got rid of the squarespace site. I just didn't think paying for a blog I rarely used was/is a good idea. I hope to start blogging more. I don't have the internet at home. Well, I have to use my blackberry as a modem and half the time it doesn't work. Nevertheless, I hope to start blogging more.

So, what's going on in my life. Here's some highlights:

• Baby is 7 months old today
• Still carrying baby weight
• After baby, got down to 152-155ish. Dr discovered thyroid and hormone issues, maybe even insulin problems
• Got down to 14, currently around 142-144
• Goal is to get back to 115ish; I'd be happy at 120
• Still in Texas
• Started new job on base. Much more challenging. For once in my life I am actually working
• I love summer time and all the produce that's available
• Summer means salads and grilling!
• Finally made it to the Farmer's Market. Went a little late, only bought peaches and pecans
• I need to start working out again. Started P90X, had finger surgery. I'd like to get back into it. My new job is right by a gym too; we'll see. Of course there was a small gym in the old building where I worked, so I won't hold me breath.

Bottom line: I haven't got the baby weight off yet, but that's my #1 goal. I still have close to 30 lbs to drop. The only way it will come off is with restricted calories and working out. By no means will I starve myself, but I have to consume less food, period. But I am not going back to the days of green beans and tuna. Sure, I'd love to look like a figure competitor, but fact is, I don't want to do the work. I peruse blogs and you can tell who belongs on the stage and who merely dreams of it. Those who belong are the ones that are working out like they're supposed to. They're eating what they're supposed to. They RARELY go off course, if at all. The ones who dream of it talk about getting on the stage but don't do the work to get up there. They're hit or miss with workouts and sticking to the meal plan and have every excuse in the book as to why they've gone off course. Well let me tell ya something: I am NEITHER. I would love to have the perfect chiseled body, but A--I am not going to do the work and B--I am not going to sit here whining about wanting to be on stage while I shove a cookie in my mouth. I will eat what I want, when I want, where I want but I will be smart about it. I just want to reach my goal weight and look good doing it. I don't need anything beyond that.

Meal plan for the next few days:

• Reuben's on whole wheat
• Tortellini salad
• Veggie Pizza

I've got nothing planned beyond that. I really haven't been eating dinner lately. I'd love for dinners to be light--salads, fruit, etc.

That's it. That's life in a nut shell. Stay tuned for more to come!